That's right...we (Jaime and I) are bringing funny back to the blogosphere! Why? Because Cville is far too serious and we all just need a good laugh. I thought I would begin bringing funny back today by discussing the mixed emotions I have about McDonalds. Disclaimer: In an effort to be truly authentic, I am about to make expose some of my darker habits. I beg you, please do not judge me.
When: Sunday,10:25 am
Who: Me, in sunglasses, seat pushed back low, hoping no one I know sees me
Where: Mickey D's drive through @ Barracks
What: Sausage, Egg & Cheese Biscuit, Hashbrown and diet coke
Why: a) i was hungry b) it actually helps my morning sickness, imagine that c) i savor the taste of fast food
I hope you now have a good visual of the scene I described. Here are some of the thoughts that go through my head when I frequent this fine dining establishment:
"Am I a bad person for eating Mcdonalds?"
"How many times a week is too much for fast food?"
"Do people judge me for going through Mcdonald's drive through?"
"Of course people don't judge me, at least not the other diners at this fine establishment!"
"Why am I ashamed that I like McDonalds?"
"I shouldn't be ashamed that I like McDonalds!"
"I LIKE MCDONALDS!"
"Why are people always suprised when they learn of my love of fast food?"
"Is it weird to sit in your car perfectly content, enjoying a quarter pounder with cheese and listening to Rush Limbaugh in a parking lot...alone?"
"I hope its not weird"
Do you think I'm crazy yet? I will say that being a fan of McDonalds in Charlottesville is not without its challenges. For example, I am very well aware of the stigma attached to McDonalds and take the proper precautions to avoid a close encounter with a tree-hugging organic hippie telling me to watch "Supersize Me" (I have by the way, but it doesn't deter me). I always throw away my cup before walking in public anywhere, and I try to quickly dispose of any evidence of my high calorie indulgence.
And although I love a Mickey D's meal now and again, I can also appreciate the goodness of Whole Foods. And I would never mix the two!!! One time I was in Whole Foods and I saw something that would have made any true foodie's skin crawl! This poor couple, probably mid 50s who looked like they were from the other side of the mountain if you get my drift, came into Whole Foods with two super-sized McDonalds cups!!! The HORROR! I felt so bad for them. I could see the mean stares they were getting from the organic C-villians and I wanted to go tell them of their faux pas to save them the embarrassment. However after thinking about it, they are probably the ones to admire. They own their decision to go to McDonalds and they are unashamed. I, on the other hand, shroud my trips to Mickey D's in secrecy, going through the drive through incognito and getting rid of the evidence. I try to act all organic and chic in Whole Foods but on the inside I am a Templeton, feasting on the lowest quality, highest fat foods available! I am a Whole Foods Fraud! Shame on me! I should just embrace who I am without worrying about the dumb social pressures of Cville. In the words of 50 cent "I am what I am...you can like it or love it." Ghetto, I know, my love for rap music will have to be another post. But for now, I invite you all to hold me accountable on being authentic about my love for the golden arches. I'm not going to hide it under a bushel any longer, next time I go through the drive through...I will take off my sunglasses and proudly sport my Mickey D's drink. I will sing with pride....Ba Da Ba Ba Baa I'm lovin it!