These two are my greatest joy and no doubt my greatest challenge. Sometimes, I wonder how on the earth God saw me fit to handle them. And then I realize, I'm supposed to parent in Christ who strengthens me. Joy is something that sometimes I struggle with in the daily reality of chasing Reese when she is running into the cul-de-sac or administering the 3rd spanking of the morning or having a screaming 15 month old in Trader Joes bc she wants to run around or trying to make lunch amidst endless requests for things and refereeing sibling fights. Sometimes I just want to scream, "I'm not good at this!!! Make it stop!!!!!" Anybody?
This is how I feel "in the natural". But I know that as a Christian, the natural is not the end for me. Something that has really helped me is the scripture Psalm 16:11 it says "In His presence is fullness of joy." I don't know about you but I need some JOY! Where do we go when circumstances leave us without joy? In God's presence. How do we get there? That's probably different for different people. But for me, I'm trying to be better about getting a little time in here and there with my bible. It doesn't have to be a big study, just a quick moment with a scripture. I try to read about the promises of God and let my mind dwell on it. Another thing has been having Christian music on, in the car and in the house. It really puts my heart in a different "posture"? Then of course, being at church is a great way to feel God's presence.
So here I am. Trying to do the best I can for my kids despite my weaknesses. Failing sometimes. Successful sometimes. Praying & desperate for God always.